Movie Review: Walking Tall

Stars (Out of 10): 4

One Word Summary: Unreal

Movie Details: Walking Tall Drama | Crime | Adventure | Action MPAA RATING PG-13 for sequences of intense violence, sexual content, drug material and language 105 minutes | Color USA WRITTEN BY David Klass Channing Gibson David Levien Brian Koppelman   DIRECTED BY Kevin Bray THEATRICAL RELEASE Apr 2, 2004   Relevant Sites: IMDB Official Movie Website Watch The Movie Trailers Shopping: Shop Amazon for items related to this movie. Shop for movie posters at AllPosters

"Walking Tall" Review:

          Walking Tall is about Chris Vaughn, a retired soldier who returns home to see that home isn't the same as it used to be. The lumber mill that employed his father and most of the town, has been closed, and now the small town's main source of income is its casino. The casino's owner, Jay Hamilton, was once Vaughn's high school football rival but now controls a crime ring that has taken over the town. After realizing that Hamilton has complete control over the town's resources, including its police, Vaughn decides to become sheriff and promises to clean up the place he once called home.

          I was deciding which movie to see this weekend… Hellboy, a movie about Satan's son as an agent for a secret American justice organization on a mission to fight the Nazi Wizard who created him, or this movie, Walking Tall. I chose this one because I didn't feel like sitting through a movie with a story so dumb and unrealistic that I could use it as a joke in another review… turns out it doesn't matter.

The very first frame of Walking Tall is a black screen and white text that says, 'Inspired by a True Story', yeah, this movie is about as inspired as The Nick & Jessica Variety Hour, and about as true as rumors of a sequel to Gigli. I don't think I've ever seen a bigger load of Hollywoodized garbage disguised as a true story, ever. When are they gonna learn… trials don't last one day, beautiful women don't shoot guns in only a bra, and NO ONE but America's favorite wrestler turned movie star can woop that much a-- with only a two-by-four and a busted knee.

Speaking of the devil… how was his performance? Well, Walking Tall is so packed full of Chris-Vaughn-fights-the-world scenes that I can't imagine it was a very hard transition for Dwayne… which leads me to believe he wasn't a very good wrestler either. The Rock isn't a good actor (plus, how can we take him seriously when he's still using his wrestling name), but he's not an actor, he's an action star, and the requirements aren't as high for them (you don't even need to speak English – Jackie Chan).

 The movie's surprising star is jackass's Johnny Knoxville. I figured the only person less likely to ever become a real actor than 'The People's Champion' would be the star of a show where guys shove matchbox cars up their (use your imagination) and go to the doctor to have it x-rayed, but Knoxville could soon be a great supporting comedic actor.